Tuesday 4 July 2017

Learning to forgive myself

I am having a tough week. The kind of week where every day throws another reason to beat yourself up at you. And it's only Tuesday. I keep making mistakes, mishearing things, misunderstanding people and letting people down. I'm having a really hard time liking myself and can't imagine why anyone would want to spend any time with me let alone like or even love me. I can't even understand why hubby, or even God would love me. I know this all sounds a bit miserable and dramatic  I'm just being real.
I can't understand why God, or anyone, would love me but I KNOW God loves me. I need to pull myself out of this low point before I get in too deep. I need to learn to forgive myself, to give myself a break. I don't really know how to do this but I have started this afternoon by listening to worship music. I also listed the things I have done wrong and asked for God's forgiveness for them. I believe God had forgiven me for those things but I am a long way off being able to forgive myself. I want to see myself as God sees me. I feel like I don't really know who I am at the moment. I don't know where my identity lies anymore. I know I am a daughter of God but I don't feel worthy just now.

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